When I was six, I played a lily pad in my first ever dance recital. I
remember my strap breaking right before I went on and running around
trying to find an adult who could fix it so that I wasn't a topless
lily pad. I assume I got it fixed, because I definitely don't remember
flashing the audience of 300, and the photo of the dance that hung in
the studio for years after showed only fully clothed lily pads (though
in the moment captured in that photo, I clearly decided to do my own
thing and show my beautiful passé while everyone else stood neatly in
place).
Since and including that performance, I have never had stage
fright or been worried about my performance. I've had small mishaps on
stage, including the heel of my pointe shoe slipping off, but nothing
that I didn't know my training could get me through. After my ballet
performance tonight, in which we danced on an uneven, warped, bouncy
floor with bubbly marley, in pointe shoes (having never rehearsed on
that floor before), with strobe lights (that we never rehearsed in or
were even informed about) while doing highly technical pointe work, with
complete black outs and low light randomly interspersed, in our first
run with full costumes or props or in that small a stage, I searched my
memory trying to think of the last time I danced that poorly for an
audience, let alone a paying one. I can't think of a time. So I'm
going with the lily pad dance. I've danced through my pas de deux
partner bleeding all over my white tutu; I've danced through my pointe
shoe ribbon snapping; I've danced through wardrobe malfunctions; I've
danced through being hit in the head by another dancer... But I've
never danced through surprise strobe lights on a surprisingly bad floor
while turning on pointe. Until tonight. But hey, at least I'm still
standing. And whatever doesn't kill me or break my leg makes me
stronger, right?
No comments:
Post a Comment