What it's like inside my head

As I got out of bed at 2:00 AM to get a glass of water:

My fiancé Jonathan [groggily]:  Don't run into the [new storage unit].

Me [perkily]:  I know what it needs! Glow tape!

J:  Yeah. That would be perfect!  We don't have any glow tape.

Me:  Yeah.  We should get some.  It's a very handy thing to have in life.

J:  Uh-huh.

Me:  Oh! I know what would work instead!  Gaff Tape.  White gaff tape.

J:  Yeah. That would be great!  We don't have any gaff.

Me:  OO!  I know what I can use that we definitely DO have!  Scotch tape!  Can I turn on the light for a second?

J: [Sigh] Yes, but how is Scotch tape going to do anything?  It's clear. [As I turn on the light and pick up a roll of masking tape on the floor by my side of the bed] Oh.  You meant masking tape.

Me: Yes, of course I meant masking tape... which... I apparently keep at my side of the bed....

 

J:  Yeah, why is there masking tape on the floor by the bed?

 

Me:  I don't know! I've been wondering that for months!! Now I know!! It's for this moment!!

 

J:  Oh my GOSH what is it like inside your head?

 

Me:  I've told you before.  Okay, picture a little girl in a pink swirly skirt and a pink flowery frilly shirt and maybe a pink hat and pink -- no, red -- shoes with a bow on them and an ankle strap, but she doesn't really like the ankle strap.  She's got a bubble blower and she's on a Slip 'N Slide and she's twirling around on the Slip 'N Slide in the sprinkler--

 

J:  --Oh, there's a sprinkler?

 

Me:  --Yes, there's a sprinkler -- of course there's a sprinkler -- and she's blowing bubbles and her skirt is swirling out to the sides.  Oh and there's a rainbow.  That's what it's like inside my head. 

 

J:  ....That's what it's like in your head?

 

Me:  Uh-huh.

 

J:  .....You're exhausting.  [Rolling over and mumbling to himself] ...of course there's a sprinkler.